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Below are the 25 most recent journal entries.

	2009.11.29  18.46 And I never felt as peaceful as when my head was on your chest.

	2009.11.24  22.59 Kissing Robert Pattinson (in my dreams) is everything I hoped it would be. The first time was in a bedroom, while visiting friends, searching for a suitcase. Then last night, I was in Greece with a birthday cake, an ex boyfriend, a hot tub. Yum.

	2009.10.24  00.00  Since when; since then: Got accepted into TFA, graduated from college, starting paying my own car insurance, deferred TFA's offer, moved back in with my parents, skinny dipped, jumped off a roof naked into a pool, made my own burrito at 711, got yelled at, bought a few cd's, completed a painting, visited relatives in North Carolina, realized once you leave you can never go back, got in a fight with my cousins new husband, haven't emailed my cousin since I left, but plan too, thought about moving to Alaska, went to the auto shop, went again, and again, threw a way too expensive party, had my ipod stolen, got in a fight with my best friend, haven't talked to my best friend in over a month, but a recent fortune cookie said I should, gave blood, had my painting displayed at a local art venue, bought a cockatoo and named her Lala, thought and still think about someone more than I should, went to the gym every day for 2 weeks, but gave that up when I got another job, volunteer at Casa Maria every Thursday, volunteer at Stand Up For Kids every Sunday, teach 5th grade CCD every Wednesday, learned what CCD stands for (Confraternity of Christian Doctrine), revised my resume, started collecting Yummy Breakfast key chains, watched too many movies on LMN, finished The Sims on PS2, bought more books than I've finished, study for the LSAT 3, sometimes, 4 days a week, give the parking meter too much change, registered to take the LSAT on December 5, saw, "Orphan" at the dollar theater on Oracle, tried to love him, but realized I couldn't, watched peoples houses so much I missed my own, went through three closets of clothes, but still haven't finished, sang Disney pop songs on Wii, thought about leasing a new car, saw a comedy show at Laffs, started using my record player, and smoked way too many cigarettes.

	2008.12.16  22.15 I finally have time to finish the book I started 3 months ago. "The Hours" by Michael Cunnigham.

	2008.12.16  22.08 I hope this doesn't  turn into an eating disorder blog: Worked out for 45 minutes. Ate 3 packets of oatmeal.

	2008.12.16  00.38 My music teacher has a girlfriend. Typical.

	2008.09.25  07.38 About Tucson: There are too many tattoo parlors and too many people with bad tattoos. I also have a small crush on my music teacher.

	2008.07.24  12.26 Its been almost a year since I've used this thing. School takes up most of my writing and I've been using my journal book to write. Memoirs and personal essays mostly. Most of my days are spent lying by the pool fingering the pages of books. I tan topless in the privacy of the backyard. I casually dip my feet in the water  and then raise my feet in the air allowing the tiny droplets of water to drip down my legs in long streams and rest onto my torso. I imagine that it makes me look sexy, even though my thoughts aren't. I keep thinking of all the mistakes that I have made my entire life and they absolutely consume me. Though none of them could be completely life changing, I am not sure. I can never be sure. I keep wanting to write them down, somehow fix them, but am afraid that I will work myself into a deeper sense of helplessness about it. I work three jobs and am so apathetic towards the rising prices. I'll be 22 in five days.

	2007.06.17  22.57 Cake: I want to love you madly I don’t want to wonder If this is a blunder I don’t want to worry whether We’re gonna stay together ’till we die I don’t want to jump in Unless this music’s thumping All the dishes rattle in the cupboards When the elephants arrive I want to love you madly I want to love you now I want to love you madly, way I want to love you, love you Love you madly I don’t want to fake it I just want to make it The ornaments look pretty But they’re pulling down the branches Of the tree I don’t want to think about it I don’t want to talk about it When I kiss your lips I want to sink down to the bottom Of the sea I want to love you madly I want to love you now, yeah I want to love you madly, way I want to love you, love you Love you madly I don’t want to hold back I don’t want to slip down I don’t want to think back to the one thing that I know i Should have done I don’t want to doubt you Know everything about you I don’t want to sit across the table from you Wishing I could run I want to love you madly I want to love you now I want to love you madly, way I want to love you, love you Love you madly

	2007.06.17  22.55 Beck: Everybody's gotta learn sometime Change your heart Look around you Change your heart It will astound you I need your lovin' Like the sunshine Everybody's gotta learn sometime Everybody's gotta learn sometime Everybody's gotta learn sometime Change your heart Look around you Change your heart Will astound you I need your lovin' Like the sunshine Everybody's gotta learn sometime Everybody's gotta learn sometime Everybody's gotta learn sometime I need your lovin' Like the sunshine Everybody's gotta learn sometime Everybody's gotta learn sometime Everybody's gotta learn sometime Everybody's gotta learn sometime Everybody's gotta learn sometime Everybody's gotta learn sometime Everybody's gotta learn sometime Everybody's gotta learn sometime

	2007.06.11  00.46 Oh, and I only think of you when I see someone really ugly or am reminded of what it might be like to have to attend foreign schools just to get laid.

	2007.06.11  00.30 I've been keeping a hand written journal given to me from my aunt in Austria. This journal will be used to post song lyrics that best reflect current situations until further notice.

	2007.03.05  00.21 undress for the tailor Finished Running with Scissors, started The Memory Keepers Daughter. I thought about how I would break up with him, but then decided that my own boredom had nothing to do with him and everything to do with me. I keep myself too busy with the things that don't. So,I changed the drawing of an unfinished painting. I drove my father tonight. He smoked while I drove. I'm much too nervous to smoke and drive and shift with him in the car. He tells me about the band Pink Floyd, as the song, Dark Side of the Moon, plays. I love him like this. Knowing him. And I myself feel like such a little girl, because I have nothing to say. The moons bright, but my father adds that its getting smaller this time of the month.

	2007.02.08  06.35 Started a new book, Running with Scissors. I haven't started or finished any paintings, but am considering buying one.

	2006.12.20  05.14 Found 20 dollars in my back pocket today

	2006.12.18  08.02 What's left now? My parents never seem to give me the chance to miss them. My mother calls me everyday day and is worried when I haven't called her for three days. They had a Christmas party and for the past three or four years that they have had one, I have always brought a different boy. But this year it was D. It's always D. And it would have been D last year, but last year they didn't have a Christmas Party. My brother comes to my apartment constantly. For the past two months, I've been working two jobs. Keeping myself busy seems to be the best way to keep myself from laying in bed most of the day and then staying up all night, but I still do it. I am enjoying this break.

	2006.11.02  04.54 Every year I get sick and swear that I will stop smoking. It's that time of the year again, but I might not quit smoking. I wish I wasn't sick on Halloween.

	2006.10.09  07.46 I went to Mt. Lemon today. We stopped once on the way up and took pictures together. My favorite part was driving up and then down the mountain. D. took me to the book store and I was able to find two books before the storm caused the lights to go out. One is called The Abortionists Daughter and the other is The Memory Keepers Daughter. Daughters seems to be a popular theme for books.

	2006.10.05  17.13 This week I thought about my life and how everyday is pretty much the same. I have decided to change this. Today I am going to Bookmans, going to diner, and staying out late. These are things I wouldn't do on school nights. ______ school nights.

	2006.09.25  17.02 Journal from 9/15 I've been interviewed for a journalism class twice now. First was on internet polling and the other was on what makes me angry. I'd like to think that I am not an angry person, but I know I am a jealous, selfish, bitch at times. Journalism questions are difficult to answer or maybe I am just not opinionated enough. Yes, something like that. I go to Starbucks during my two hour breaks, but I may stop once I learn about the corruption in Central America involving free trade. I think I will do well this semester, raise my GPA some more, apply for a scholarship. My parents miss me. I wish I could miss them. What's stopping me is the fact that I see them every week. I am happy to say that K. is my best friend and I am comforted by the fact that I can even say this. Mainly because last summer I cried and told myself that D. was my best friend, but he isn't. He's more like my 3rd best friend. I'd like to get another job and update my resume. But who has time for these things? I feel tired in my lecture classes and quiet in French class. Words don't mean as much as prayers, something that I need to say more of. I'd also like to have white teeth.

	2006.04.04  18.06 my love will turn you on

	2006.03.09  14.56 I haven't had a public entree since about January 11. You tell me why that is.

	2006.01.16  16.29 I want to get the feel goods.

	2006.01.11  14.02 I'm packing. Packing socks, clean clothes, new shoes, christmas stuff, everything into a suit case. Tie my hair back, pin my bangs back, wear something in the back of my closet. I need to remember movies and to bring my cd's back home. Tomorrow I'll get new notebooks. The 80 page kind. I need to get dressed. It's 2.

	2006.01.07  17.03 Does anyone have a life I can borrow?